Reflections continued

Hello to fellow pilgrims (those in India and those in America),

I am continuing to remain partially between Indian and Wisconsin time, which makes for some interesting days and nights:) I awoke this morning, early (like 3 am) convinced that I was still in India...despite the fact that it was quiet outside and my cat was sleeping next to me. After a few minutes, logic came forward and I accepted the fact that I was not in India:)

Unable to fall back asleep, I crawled out of bed, made some breakfast, and sat down at my computer. My attention returned to my travel journal, laying open at the desk where I had left it the day before, when I had begun looking at it, intent on piecing together the past few weeks, both for my own process and in order to share with others just what happened. After several hours I have pieced together a travel log of the discussions, practices and teachings received on pilgrimage...for anyone who wants copies...let me know.

However, despite completing this log...much feels up in the air...where did the time go? How am I changed? Rinpoche said something very early on in the retreat, during the teaching on personality..."Who am I?"..."I am me"

I am not the person who got on a plane for the first time in my life, or the person who stepped off into a foreign country, or even the person that sat gazing up at the Bodhi tree...I am who I am....and at the same time I am not that one...

So, now, as the questions start to filter to the surface...what comes to mind is...and I ask myself and I ask you all: What did we do on pilgrimage? Or perhaps the question is more of, "What did it mean to be on pilgrimage? because it strikes me that pilgrimage is not something that involves doing but rather being.

Some of the thoughts that come to mind...on pilgrimage...
We learned. We experienced. We remembered. We struggled, we persevered and we triumphed. We practiced and we requested. We listened, we heard and we understood.

We were practitioners, we were pilgrims, and we simply were...

I can't come up with a better way to say it...and as I will sit in Thiensville, WI tonight, where a group is gathering at Jim and Ozer's house to share tales and stories about India...I know that some stories, some experiences to be shared will be funny, some will be hard to believe, some will be joyful, some will simply be what they are... and some stories and experiences will remain wordless and inexpressible...held carefully inside...in a place where they will be remembered energetically.

Perhaps the true answer to the question I asked...is that pilgrimage is simply a journey... a journey to outer locations, but it is also a journey to inner places, and a remembering of those energetic addresses.

Be well all and much love,
Menma